Funny Bingo Jokes
• Before or during the next meeting, seminar, or conference call that you have make up a "Bullcrap Bingo card, as you can draw a square, 5" x 5" is a legit size to use, and then divide it into columns, 5 across and 5 down, which will give you 25 blocks of 1 inch.
• Write one of these phrases in each of the blocks: synergy, strategic fit, core competencies, out of the loop, benchmark, value added, proactive, at the end of the day, touch base, active listening, mindset, client focused, ballpark, game plan, leverage, technology, best practices, bottom line, revisit, paradigm, 24/7, win win, think outside the box, fast track, result driven, empower, and knowledge-base.
• Check off the block when one of those is called during your meeting seminar or what have you.
• When you get 5 blocks either in a horizontal, vertical, or diagonal manner, you should yell "Bullcrap" right away.
This is a way to put some funny bingo jokes into your workday, which can sometimes get a little boring, to say the least.
His wife said, "I won it while playing bingo."
A couple of days later she came home wearing a fur coat and he asked again, "where did you get that?"
She said the same thing; "I won it while playing bingo."
The very next night she came roaring up the driveway in a brand new BMW and again he asked, "Where did you get that?"
His wife looked at him and said, "Hey, do not keep asking where I got these things, no go run me a warm bath."
His wife went to the bathroom and in the tub there was only a little bit of water in the bathtub and she turns to him and asks, "Why is there only a little water in the bathtub?"
He says, "I did not want to take the chance of your card getting wet!"
* * *What has a lot of little balls and is always screwing old women?
A funny bingo jokes machine.
* * *Fred and Bob were playing one evening.
Fred was constantly looking over Bob's shoulder and telling him that you have to mark off that number, you have to mark that number off.
After not saying anything for a while Bob became aggravated and said, "why don't you mark it off on your sheet"?
Fred said, "I can't do that because it's full!"
* * *A man and wife are playing and were competing against each other to see who could yell out funny bingo jokes the most.
The magic number was 5 to win this little match.
5 came up and they both won. Because of this it was even.
"No it wasn't!" the wife shouted, "I said it quicker!"
* * *Two bored dealers at a casino at the craps table. A very good-looking blond woman comes to the table and lays down $15,000 on one roll of the dice.
She says, "I hope you don't mind fellas, but I am much more comfortable shooting the dice when I am completely naked."
She then takes off all of her clothes and rolls the dice and shouts, "come on, momma needs some new clothes."
She then yells, Yes! Yes! I Won, I am a Winner!"
She jumps for joy and gives a big hug to each of the dealers.
She then grabs her clothes and money and quickly leaves the table.
The dealers are tongue-tied and just stare at each other.
After a couple of minutes one of the dealer asks the other one, "Hey, what did she roll?"
"I have no idea, I though you were watching the dice?"
Moral to the Story: Not all blond women are stupid, but all men are men.
Play bingo and read funny bingo jokes to distract from the everyday world. And by the way is much funnier jokes bingo player than the average person.